MATILDA Oh yeah, huh, well, uh Agatha Trunchbull: Good-bye, Mrs Phelps. And then, my great, big, beautiful chocolate-y burp, which now seemed to have a mind of its own, wafted full into the face of the Trunchbull! I live in a cage, Harry! Dance competition's over. Now, get off to bed, you little bookworm. . "I have paid for the posters, publicity, the catering, the toilet facilities. Ow! I chose looks! [looking at a portrait of her father] ], [She turns and walks back to her desk. What about rules, Honey? . . And you know where you'll end up? Stuff it in. According to a constitutional law book that I read in the library, if you don't have one, you could lose your job or even go to federal prison. MR WORMWOOD [She presses an intercom on her desk.] Let out your belt. Matilda is a very intelligent and determined young girl appearing in the Roald Dahl children's book of the same name. She found a small cottage. . Corny, sweet, and funny all in one. What have I told you about wearing pigtails? . Five times two is ten. When all had quietened down, she stepped forward and produced . Dip face! Matilda: Narrator: Come stai? Yes. This miracle . [He does a split in front of MISS HONEY. In other words, a pick-up line is an icebreaker or a conversation opener. ALL GIRLS Eight times two is sixteen. From a book in the library. The more that you try, Come along, Bogtrotter. Stand out from the crowd! . You're getting on a plane, Mrs Wormwood? | ESCAPOLOGIST [off-stage] It's just that they want that child so very much. WHY ARE ALL THESE WOMEN MARRIED? MRS WORMWOOD NIGEL Someone poured a whole can of syrup onto Trunchbull's chair. As a huge cloud of chocolate-y gas wafted from my mouth and drifted across the class. My hands are tied. It must be wonderful for a child to be so wanted. The table stops and the hands hit the ground. Mine are driving me crazy. guy . Just knock on the door. Great, big, question-asking . Not the end of your nose. At night, they listened to the silence of their big, empty house, and they would imagine how beautiful it would be if it was filled with the sound of a child playing. Goofs Miss Honey taught us how to spell a long word yesterday. Haven't I just told you that she is a gangster? [He slides down on his thighs stage left.]. He's a small, ratty man, with luscious black hair. MRS WORMWOOD This living 'ell. If you can't handle the little brat, I'LL LOCK HER IN THE CHOKEY! endobj You seem to think that people like people what are clever. Harry Wormwood: This calls for a proper smoke. MATILDA enters from her bedroom. Harry Wormwood: Miss Trunchbull, I was the one who was at your house last night, and I think Agatha Trunchbull: Maybe you used some of mummy's peroxide by mistake. Jenny: But I . Agatha Trunchbull: My mummy says I'm a jumped-up little germ, For men. There's nothing to fear. . RUDOLPHO enters from behind a gap in the curtain behind her. Am I . Agatha Trunchbull: MISS TRUNCHBULL Agatha Trunchbull: It's just pathetic! The DOCTOR and the CHILDREN sing into their stethoscopes. Before my happy days were over, But if I try I can remember, Maryn Liles Feb 17, 2023 It's no lie that online dating. [to MICHAEL] Get up, boy. MRS PHELPS retreats to the smaller block and sits down. The tiniest mite packs the mightiest sting. What is your name? MISS TRUNCHBULL flails victoriously, then starts blowing her whistle. He's part Italian, you know. I've often thought about it, but I can't abandon my children. This child doesn't have a "thingie" . Why would you want to read when you got the television set sitting right in front of you? People don't like smarty-pants what go 'round I . Filthy, nasty things. The CHILDREN reach out from behind the gate as the BIG KIDS carry them away. MISS TRUNCHBULL's office, complete with her in a high-backed chair (facing the back of the stage) is wheeled in. MRS WORMWOOD exits. In my class, that is, er, there is a little girl called Matilda Wormwood. Michael: . "It is our destiny ". [to MRS WORMWOOD] Would you please shut up? Ever since the day doc chopped the umbilical cord, Like Romeo and Juliet, My school is a model of discipline! As long as you enjoyed the cake. We give the Whisper Challenge a shot with a little spin on it. Agatha Trunchbull: Please, stand, and do as much as you can. He'd call me bumblebee. Just so you all know, she's my best friend! The great feat was instantly forgotten, and the applause went on for nearly an hour. You have to put it right . An extraordinary girl with a sharp mind and a vivid imagination takes a daring stand to change her story with miraculous results. If,1,null Matilda Pick Up Lines. Agatha Trunchbull: (Bruce!) Miss Honey: Claiming that they know stuff we don't know. Flipping, filthy, nasty, stupid Russians! You're going to hug all the air out of me. MRS WORMWOOD There's nothing you can get from a book that you can't get from a television faster. Matilda: [accusing Matilda of putting a newt in her drinking water] DOCTOR What did you think? 100 Best Pickup Lines for Girls That Actually Work | by Qasim Adam | ILLUMINATION | Medium 500 Apologies, but something went wrong on our end. Just knock on the door. You slithered like a serpent into the school kitchen and ate MY PERSONAL SNACK! My word is my law! . What is this trash you're reading? Good morning, children! And people would come from miles around: kings! They're all mistakes, children! [as the TV explodes, due to Matilda's powers] CHILDREN But I think it's good for grown-ups to have their own space. You wouldn't listen. and the great performers would instantly oblige with the most spectacular show, just for them. MATILDA opens a cupboard at the front of the stage. The curtain is wheeled away to reveal MRS WORMWOOD. You could have heard a fly burp. With a little help from us, she could go to university before she . | That was only the first part of your punishment. . 105 Cute Pick-Up Lines That'll Make Them Smile And Text You Back Melanie Gervasoni and Saimonas Lukoius Oh shoot, here we are again. Zinnia Wormwood: . AAAIIGHHH! They're the bane of my life. The Wormwoods laugh. Harry Wormwood: If you want to throw the hammer for your country, Might as well be saying you think that it's okay, But Harry's ranting and raving gave Matilda the key to her power. [she lunges the ball at the door, ultimately puncturing it immensely]. Harry Wormwood: MRS WORMWOOD MR WORMWOOD MRS WORMWOOD Of course they didn't believe me: I've got green hair! You gotta be loud! "Time is on our side. No kid likes being yelled at. MISS TRUNCHBULL Ev-er-y life is unbelievably unlikely. Starring: Alisha Weir, Emma Thompson, Lashana Lynch. Doesn't mean that you just have to grin and bear it. No one's gonna love you if you don't know the rumba. Matilda: Oh, my head! Harry Wormwood: No one's gonna care if you don't care, Bambinatum! Mrs. Wormwood: And if you cry it will be (W) double. BIG KID [BEN] DOCTOR It was the biggest burp I had ever heard. Look what you've done, you stupid woman. What can I do? One look at my face and it's plain to see. The moved into a beautiful old house at the edge of town, and in the evenings, they would walk and take the air. Don't sneer at educated people, Mr. Wormwood. MATILDA grabs her books and runs off the front of the stage. MRS WORMWOOD AMANDA His fingie. "Escapologist", he says! . You'll be surprised at how well it works. We never thought it was possible, [He laughs.] Agatha Trunchbull: said the wife, smiling sadly and slipping her hand into his. You are guilty, because you are a fiend. Oh, that's where it's at! MATILDA THE MUSICAL. The CHILDREN and BIG KIDS hang their heads. A brand new human being! What? The group sets off party poppers down the line. Matilda quotes are certainly quotable for movie fans. And you won't be getting "right" there, oh no. You are a teacher. Now EAT IT! My skin looks just revolting in this foul, fluorescent light. Harry Wormwood: When the hinges creak and the door is closed, A purple spotlight starts to make its way from Bruce across the classroom. With every swallow, you are tightening the noose. Yes, sir. For being a smart aleck! These books gave Matilda a hopeful and comforting message: You are not alone." Roald Dahl, Matilda tags: books , literature , reading , words My daddy says I'm his special little guy. . All right! You will soon see there's no escaping tragedy. and I shan't be talking to you for the rest of the evening, you horrid little man! But to me, they tell a deeper story. The ACROBAT enters from the back of the stage, and the ESCAPOLOGIST takes her by the hand. This means that pick-up lines are all about first impressions. These raunchy, inappropriate, dirty pick up lines probably won't make anyone fall madly in love with you but they will definitely earn you a laugh. No one's going to listen if you don't shout. Matilda Wormwood: I wonder what Miss Trunchbull is afraid of. She puts down the large block and MATILDA stands on it. Chew your food; you're an animal! What's wrong with the telly? You And sailed high up, up above the stands Now go watch TV like a good kid. I'll have her for that. It is, is it? I should be wearing in the semi-finals tonight! four hundred and eighty-seven. DOCTOR Being funny or clever can also help your chances of success. Jenny: Just write. MISS HONEY [chanting with the rest of the class] . That's right, sir. "Lovely"? See more ideas about matilda quotes, matilda, quotes. Jul 25, - Barney Stinson's Harry Potter pick up lines. MR WORMWOOD The Birthday table is wheeled back in by other children. [He stomps and crouches on the floor, pulling at his hat and making sounds of exertion. "Right"? That's the biggest lie I've ever heard. Are they good runners? Jenny: The cook enters, holding an enormous chocolate cake on a tray, along with a wooden spoon. Mrs Wormwood, I want you to think very carefully. Miss Honey: Agatha Trunchbull: Oh, it's Miss Honey. Is there still time for the Bi-Annual Inter-Championship Amateur Sausage . BRUCE turns around and burps for a full ten seconds. [Looking irritated, she makes her way to BRUCE's side.] She laughs. MATILDA To fetch a pail of water. LAVENDER [She murmurs along to the music.] [Jenny knocks on Ms. Trunchbull's door] OLDER KIDS That's where Ms. Trunchbull lives. Agatha Trunchbull: This uncorrupted mind. [He finally gives up and straightens up casually.] "A contract was signed to perform this feat, and perform this feat you shall! This is Rudolpho! BIG KIDS What? Jenny: . See! The stage goes black. Past Matilda. Yes. MISS HONEY steps away from MATILDA as MISS TRUNCHBULL enters by the blackboard. You really don't know anything, do you? . She is clearly more emotionally developed than her peers. [She takes a mirror from the armchair.] MR WORMWOOD [snatching the book from Matilda and tears the pages out of the cover]. Ever since the day doc chopped the umbilical cord, My daddy says I'm a bore. Jenny : Quite the contrary. Mrs. Wormwood: We have everything . Mum, would you like to hear a story? Where are you going? . Mrs. C, Mrs. U, Mrs. L-T-Y! There's not a lot of difference in size. Well, this crime took place before school started. Lovekins, where's my breakfast? Michael, pencil and paper, in the kitchen. Tricks!" Harry Wormwood: The guy with the stupid haircut! WOMAN: Well, take another! DOCTOR That's not fair at all! What you know matters less Well, then stop her reading! MISS TRUNCHBULL This it not your problem. And do you tell them lots of stories like you do with me? [looks at Miss Honey and warning the children they were watching us] Matilda: MATILDA and ACROBAT [off stage] "The books transported her into new worlds and introduced her to amazing people who lived exciting lives. "You Must Be Worried Now That Donald Trump is President Because He Would Deport You Back to Heaven." Two times . ACROBAT and ESCAPOLOGIST [off-stage] One look at my face and it's plain to see. MISS TRUNCHBULL FBI Agent Bob: Four judges in outrageous costumes sit behind it. Overall, the best pickup line is one that is creative and original. . Not a detail of my throw was adjusted or forgotten. He drops it again. I don't know. BIG KIDS approach and start climbing onto the gate and grabbing the CHILDREN from behind it. 28 of the best book quotes from Matilda. "AMANDA" drops from the rafters above the audience into a pile of coats underneath her. The most precious gift the natural world can bestow upon us has been handed to you. I think he blinked. 1 0 obj And you may sit and read while I teach the others, and, well, if you have any questions, I shall do my best to answer them. And even if you could, BIG KIDS MISS TRUNCHBULL sniffs and licks the air. Written by Trunchbull on the blackboard: Sorry, Miss Trunchbull. 4. and . The vanity rises again, signifying morning. She re-enters carrying two square blocks, one larger than the other. DOCTOR The scene switches to the Wormwood's living room. It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me. Wouldn't you agree, Miss Honey? It's from the library! MRS PHELPS Three times two is six. Matilda? You'll be punished so seVerely if you step out of line. We don't want to burst a blood vessel on your first day. Six times two is twelve. If you're being smart with me, young lady, you're going to be punished. The scene changes to the Wormwood's living room. LAVENDER Now, can anyone read this? One times two is two. I don't want another one. 3. Eat! But unless you want to suffer, listen up MATILDA Damn girl, I think I need a Parlyz Heal, Because you're stunning. You have to stay inside the circle . Calculate this! . Matilda, you promised me you wouldn't go back in that house again. Ha, ha, ha, ha Harry Wormwood: Good Lord, woman, have you started already? "I'm right and you're wrong, I'm big and you're small, and there's nothing you can do about it.". MR WORMWOOD kicks her out of the way, talking on the telephone. Look at this. MR WORMWOOD I hope you know CPR, because you are taking my breath away. Whee! That's exactly what you've done. Jenny: . A bell rings. She puts it down on the desk behind BRUCE. When I'm finished with you, you're gonna look like roadkill! That is v . Matilda: . Used to compete in the Olympics, throwing the hammer! Good heavens. Because she's a spectacularly wonderful child and I love her. What? Hanging down by your ears. [Michael's mouth drops open in shock upon seeing Harry's hair]. Don't tell me. Angrily, MISS TRUNCHBULL looks from NIGEL to MATILDA and back.